A Poem by My Daughter

I’m a Girl

I’m a girl with a strong liver and an even stronger spirit.

Who only needed one heartbreak to learn her lesson and who doesn’t let just anybody into her life.

I’m a girl who takes her shots without a chaser

and who prefers bare feet to high heels.

I’m a girl who drives too fast and listens to her music too loud.

I care so much it hurts, and I have a heart that’s too big for my body.

I laugh too loud and cuss when I’m mad.

Country music speaks to my soul, and I’ve always preferred open spaces to the city anyway.

Sometimes I just need a cigarette and I don’t need your judgment.

I’m a girl who thinks that a big bowl of ice cream can make anything better

and who pretends she doesn’t cry during sad movies.

I cut my hair to defy gender roles.

At a party, I’m not gonna shove my tits in your face,

but I will throw my words at you. And if you can’t handle them,

then you can’t handle me.

I talk to my cat and I swear that she understands me.

I don’t like every single person I meet, but I do my best to love them all.

I don’t believe in God, but sometimes I just need to pray to Something.

I say the word Fuck when I probably shouldn’t,

but that never seems to stop me.

I’m not a size 2 but I don’t want to be either.

I’m a girl who would rather play in the waves than lay in the sand.

A girl who’s not afraid to get her hands dirty

and sweat from a day’s hard work.

When I see something happening that is wrong, I do something about it

and I stand up for those who can’t stand up for themselves.

I’m a girl that some would call crazy, and maybe I am.

Crazy makes life more interesting.

I’m scared to death of having a child, and even more scared of raising one.

I may not ever be Miss America, but I will always be my daddy’s princess.

I’m a girl who is as free as the bird she always wanted to be.

And someday I will fly away.

I’m a girl who believes that there is never a wrong time to say “You’re beautiful”

or “I love you”

I’m a dreamer and a lover and a sister and a daughter.

I can’t tell you where I’m going to be in a year or what I’m going to be like then.

I’m a girl who is a different person depending on the day of the week and what she had for lunch.

But one thing is for sure and is never going to change.

I am a girl who is never going to be anybody but me.


Day 17 & 18

Not much to write. I feel great. People are starting to notice the weight loss. I guess 24.4 pounds in a little over two weeks might get some people’s attention. Even my kids said they noticed a difference in how my shirts fit and how I look. The greatest place of notice is in my face. Another 20 or 25 pounds and I’ll be happy to be at that weight. At that point I’m going to start to hit the weight room along with cardio. I now have a goal to look as good as I feel and for some reason that is tied up in having the muscle mass that I had ten years ago. I know the clock has spun much in those years but I will take my time and am determined to get back in that shape.

Day 16

It was a fairly uneventful day. I made it to the gym for a fifth day in a row and plan on number six before it being closed on Easter. Woke up to find myself -22.6 pounds total. Had lunch of Buffalo chicken strips on lettuce with an apple and my one piece of Melba toast. For dinner I had an herbed London broil and it will be part of the rotation. I got six portions out of one six dollar steak. Added my apple and Melba toast and I had a complete meal. I see the weight loss mostly in my face and feel it in the way my shirts are fitting again. Another day, another pound.

Day 15

Still going strong n this diet but the food prep for every meal. Had buffalo chicken strips on a bed of spring salad for lunch and shrimp curry w/tomatoes for dinner. As of morning weigh in I was -21.4. This is going so well that I forgot what my weight was when I entered it into the treadmill. I have been in the 260+ for so long that to enter 138 seemed foreign to me. This kind of progress makes the missing of pizza, garlic bread, and beer and booze tolerable.

Day 14?

Somehow I missed a day or two or miscounted of screwed up one way or another. All I know is that I started this diet two weeks ago tomorrow.  As of this morning I am -20.4 pounds and feel a ton better. Food tastes pretty good and I even think I might keeping eating more healthy once I am done with this. I do miss pizza and some other foods but the variety I have found is pretty good. Had savory chicken soup tonight and couldn’t quite finish it all. I’ve been going to the gym and spending an hour on the treadmill most day burning about 400 calories a pop. When I leave I am often in negative calories for the day. It’s just nice to have clothes start fitting again. We’ll see how much I lose in this journey.

Day 11

Another day, another .8 pounds. As of this morning I am -17.2 pounds. Feeling good and feeling stronger.

I repeated the curry shrimp for lunch and had eggs for dinner. I ate both my apples today and even walked on the treadmill for an hour after work and spent about 25 minutes in the sauna. I feel great and had to keep from walking in front of the full length mirror naked to see how much I’ve lost. It might have been a little creepy doing it at the YMCA. That’s life lived in an RV I guess. Well, that’s it for now. We’ll see what tomorrow brings.

Day 11

The day started out early for me since I needed to polish my Palm Sunday sermon. Started a pot of coffee after weighing myself. Another pound lost so that makes me -16.4 as of today. Not too bad of an investment but I am not content with my current weight. I look forward to losing another 25 before I consider stopping.

Tried a new recipe today. Had curry chicken and tomatoes. A pleasant change to not eat greens with a meal.  It was very good but I was so full from eating it I could hardly eat my whole apple. For dinner I had the buffalo chicken on a bed of lettuce/spinach.

I look forward to another day on this journey tomorrow.